RC-2017, aka Grit
To RC-2047, aka Crash
"Crash, if I listed every time you wrecked a vehicle, it would fill a book."

"That V-19 is supposed to have three wings. How did you manage to loose them all in the hangar?"

"So we hit a bunker, bounced off a spider droid, and went through a barricade. Did I miss anything?"
RC-2047's reply- "You forgot the ricochet off the ground and the wing I used as an anchor. Sir."

"No, Crash. You can't drive the Acclamator. Not even from low to high orbit."

"I know it's a swing bench. Put belts on it anyway, for anyone riding it with you."

RC-1313, aka Scope to RC-2017

"Sarge, tell HQ I need a ghilie suit sent up." *pause* "If they don't mind sending me a sixth suit. Sir."

"That was a matchless precision shot. We'll be the talk of the barracks for weeks. I mean, there isn't another man in the company who could have knocked that kaminiise hut'uun's belt off from a thousand
yards off. Or convinced the di'kut I saved his life."

"Set up markers on those tree stumps. And put one on Crash's ass if he swaps out my camo paint for neon colors again."

When confronted by Grit over a precise hole in an embarrassing place on a bill board, undoing to censorship on a skin add- "I haven't the foggiest sir. No idea who could have done it. Besides, you know I would have put two to make her even."

On joking about the idea of pay and being told by Grit he'd just spend it all on more rifles and scopes-
"Not at all, sarge- You forgot the custom tree stand, insulated blind, and bantha feeder kit."


Grit to RC-2471, aka Torch

"No, it won't burn."

"Next time I'm making sure to seal your requisition orders before you can change 'five thermal dets' to 'five dozen thermal dets.' "

"That would be a great idea- if the plan was to level the entire city block."

"Sorry Torch, but HQ says you can't keep the rocket pod from the hailfire you downed as
a personal sidearm."

"Those things are supposed to be anti armor, not anti everything."

On being told by Torch the latter wishes to cook on a fire-
"So how many dozen fuel cans do you need for this?"

"I didn't know you play drums, Torch." *opens the bass drum and finds Torch's stash of thermal detonators* "Only two dozen thermal dets? You're understocked, soldier."





More as I think of em.

I think I'm in love with that Torch-guy! Pyromaniacs rule!

These were very entertaining! I feel inspired to make a list of hilarious com action from my commandos, too. Do you put these charming gentleman in stories as well?

I do have one in the works, in fact. A short on the sabotage of a droid factory.


A few I though of at work-

Grit: You can't blow up a hardcell with a T'bac lighter!
Torch: I'll be the judge of that.

Grit: Scope?
Scope: Yessir.
Grit: I know they told you to keep a lookout, but....
Scope: But?
Grit: We're fighting droids here, not shooting game. Knock it off with the bird calls.

Crash: Sarge, have you seen the new speeder bike yet?
Grit: Yeah. I'm not gettin on it. That BARC model is a deathtrap.*pause*
And no, you can't test drive it.

Very nice...